Welcome to The Nirbhau Foundation
Everyone at The Nirbhau Foundation would like to share our deepest condolences for your loss and for what you are going through. We understand how devastating it is when a baby dies, as the founders of this charity have personally been through this painful experience.
The Nirbhau Foundation (TNF) works across the country to support anyone affected by the loss of a baby at any stage of pregnancy, birth or infancy. We understand the pain and heartbreak that families go through and are dedicated to providing support and comfort during this difficult time. We provide memory boxes filled with keepsakes and mementos to help families create lasting memories of their loved one.
We understand that every family's journey is different, and we strive to improve the services given to families who have lost a baby or child. We want to make sure that no family has to go through this difficult time alone. We know that everyone grieves differently and there is no right or wrong way to go about it. We’re here to help, as much as we can.
The Nirbhau Foundation was set up by Mandeep Kaur (Mandy) and Kuldeep Singh (Kully). Usually, whenever you read an “about us” section on websites, they’re really professionally written and have a set structure to it, almost like a mini sales pitch. We decided not to do that necessarily, but to speak individually on our experience and why we set this charity up in the first place. Starting with Mandy’s journey and finishing up with Kully’s thoughts.
A mother's journey...
In July 2023, my heart shattered into a million pieces when our baby was diagnosed with Edwards syndrome. After several tests, I went into labour and our precious daughter Nirbhau was born. We held her, touched her, spent time with her, told her we loved her and always would.
The loss was devastating, it was like nothing I had faced before. It was like I was living my worst nightmare and time felt like it stood still. I would spend all day thinking about my tiny baby, I missed her so much. Whilst in hospital, we received a memory box which provided us with comfort, memories we could treasure forever and keepsakes. I remember clinging onto the teddy and keeping it with me all the time. At the time it felt like it was the only thing keeping me sane.
The next few weeks and months were so hard especially having to plan a funeral for our baby but I found a way to exist. I tried to return to ‘normal’ life but nothing about it was normal. I had changed, I carried our angel in my heart and so desperately wished things were different.
I realised that baby loss is not talked about and this felt isolating. Babies born after 24 weeks gestation are officially recorded as stillbirths, which made me feel like my baby didn’t matter because she was born before the 24 week mark. The certificate of life included in the memory box was appreciated as I felt like my baby was acknowledged.
Although my arms were empty, yearning and aching for the baby we had so many dreams for she has given me strength to keep going, the courage to not give up, a voice to honour and the hope to see light in darkness.
Nirbhau lives on in us and The Nirbhau Foundation is her legacy. I often think about her, all the moments we never got to build, the smiles we never shared and the siblings she will never know. As my first born, she made me a mummy and I will forever be grateful for that. This is why I always talk about her and include her in all that we do. Because of her, I carry on and exist.
One step at a time, you will get there too.
A father's story...
At the start of 2023, both me and Mandy came to the decision that we were ready to start a family. We both felt the time had come and we were ready to have a baby. We got the good news and I cannot describe the feeling of being told we were about to become parents for the first time. I was genuinely so happy and felt that all my problems just seemed to go away.
Unfortunately this feeling wasn't to last, after our initial 3 month scan, we were told our baby had excess fluid at the back of her neck and also in her abdomen. This wasn't the news we expected to hear and we both had a weird feeling something just wasn't right.
Fast forward a few extra weeks where we had countless hospital appointments and scans, eventually the bad news was confirmed and we were told that our little girl had Edwards syndrome. I didn't even know what this was at the time, but after speaking with the doctors and researching it, we knew there would be some serious heartache ahead.
I never thought something like this would happen to us and I still find it difficult to accept it even today. Mandy went into labour and on the 24th of July 2023 and our precious little baby girl was born at 2:09am. I will never forget that moment of seeing her for the first time and holding her in the palm of my hand. The feeling of losing a child is unbearable and there are no words to describe the pain, you’re literally helpless.
We named our little angel Nirbhau, which translates to ‘without fear’. Ever since the loss, I have always said to Mandy we need to do something to help not just ourselves in finding a purpose but for others who find themselves in a similar situation. We received some support but genuinely it was nowhere near enough, and I personally struggled a lot.
This is why we have set up ‘The Nirbhau Foundation’ to support those who go through this horrible pain of losing a child. We want everyone to know that Nirbhau Kaur did exist even though she wasn't around for long, this will be her forever lasting legacy and her name will live on even after we’ve gone.
The Nirbhau Foundation in Action
registered with the fundraising regulator
The Nirbhau Foundation are proud to be registered with the Fundraising Regulator. This shows our commitment to legal, open, honest and respectful fundraising, which helps us build trust with donors and the public. We believe transparency is very important.
